Great essay on two of my favorite films of the year. I think the best of art helps us to investigate ourselves, and your essay definitely helped to open up a further internal conversation on these works.
And for the record, I don’t think there is any way to truly be in love without being willing to give up some level of control or “rightness?”
thanks for reading darren. to your second point on relinquishing control, yes, i think this is what they mean when they say you fall in love when you aren’t looking for it :)
I’m not a part of Nicolandria nation, but I do think this argument of being happier if you were stupid could apply hear. Obviously we do not know everything in the villa, but it is obvious that Nic and Olandria have far more chemistry than Olandria and Taylor. But logically, on paper, Taylor is what Olandria wants. Her whole energy in the villa seems to be that she is loving with her head. However, her natural chemistry with Nic is clear, even if it makes no sense, and a perfect one to explore in a temporary environment like the villa. It’s stupid, and the relationship would probably have no longevity out in the real world, but there is something there, a connection, that I wish was explored even if it is nonsensical
Yes yes yes. You’re spot on. I originally had a paragraph about how Olandria thinks with her head while Amaya moves with her heart and is better for it. Amaya is lowkey the most emotional mature person in the house and moves on from men when they don’t give her the respect she needs. Olandria on the other hand overthinks herself into inaction, convincing herself that Taylor likes her when he doesn’t with her “he know where home is” mental gymnastics.
For as much shit as this season got , and it is well deserved because it has been a mess, I think putting this mess out in 4K is good because it has so many examples of what not to do and even caused me to reflect on the way I see myself in these characters and how that may not be the best thing lol
Right? I feel like it’s lowkey giving us powerful lessons lol. Do you think we are getting movie night? Also what do you think they are gonna do about Cierra…
After the stand on business challenge I genuinely worry for the players psyche so I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t do it this season. By now we should have had a meet the family episode but none of the couple are serious enough to warrant that…
Re: Cierra I think it’s too late in the season to pull her out and it doesn’t seem like she’s going to win it, so I think production will keep her for the remaining week left
Yessss! 100% agree. They are both great example of your point and exist on opposite ends of the spectrum. Amayas journey is also just more fun to watch and is more dynamic where as Olandria seems a bit more calculated and guarded. And that’s no shade to Olandria, I’ve been there before. But after being burned so many times, an Amaya like approach in being open hearted but firm on boundaries is the move.
As an avid love island watcher, it seems like the casted a lot of influencers or aspiring influencers this season who were far too aware of their perception. Bella-A, Amaya, and Jalen were the only “normal” ones this season and were rewarded for it when it comes to opportunities outside the villa. The bag that waits for Amaya is going to be crazy which is the ironic twist for those who entered the game trying to obtain the same thing but failed to deliver in authenticity.
I think it's interesting you don't mention Amaya who I think is stupid per this framework personified and obviously America's favorite (she quickly became my favorite). Especially because the cast clearly does a 180 on her when they realize how much the viewers love her and that felt SO calculated.
Also I fully saw Chelley and Ace as trauma bonding and sunk cost fallacy more than a calculated choice. But I also think Ace is a 22 yo idiot (as all 22 yos) who probably had his world shaken more than he'd like to admit when he realized his perception on the show was clearly NOT what he thought. Sorry I am a bit late, I got her through Tell the Bees.
Smart observation! The original Love Island paragraph in this essay was actually contrasting Amaya vs Olandria, how Amaya’s open-ended approach has actually rendered her more emotionally intelligent and open to love than Olandria’s overburden reasoning. But, the show was changing so quickly episode to episode and I didn’t want to “pit two queens against each other,” so I elevated it to a broader theme lol. I think there’s a lot to learn from Amaya. She embraces her inner child and doesn’t spend time convincing someone who doesn’t like her to like her, whereas Olandria was very rational but I think sometimes used that reason to keep herself from being as happy as she could she’s been. Were you happy with the winner?
Oh I love Olandria too but as an emotional girlie who is on the blunter end of the communication spectrum, I am partial to Amaya.
Plus I found Olandria's choices frequently frustrating through no fault of her own and I get where she is coming from. Especially- and I feel really weird for being the one to say this, but she is a darker skinned Black woman so also has more pressures I think around being publicly a raw nerve and chasing what she wants. But like, Taylor didn't like her from the get go. I also didn't like Nic. I think they definitely have a connection and I am team Olandria being happy but his 180 on that supposedly deep connection with Cierra and idk. Everything about him feels fake.
I did feel bad for Clarke but I also saw that more going like Taylor did Olandria dirty- he totally lead her on and like America loves Olandria as they should.
Which is all to say I think this season was super weird for a bunch of reasons but I am overall happy with the ending.
Actually the more I think about it the more my frustration is really the men were SO SO SO SO SO SO SO bad this season so really the fact that any of these women found anything remotely good is a miracle. Like think there were 3 men total I didn't hate at some point, and one of them is Pepe who has a Joker Sleeve.
He's great! but that tattoo IS SO BAD! In a season of some ROUGH tattoos. Anyway hope you enjoyed it. I really enjoyed your Love Island thoughts so hope you'll keep watching but I am a dyed in the wool reality TV sicko and don't wish that on anyone else.
Yeah, I loved the lore of Nicolandria but Nic is not a viable option for her haha. He’s just trying to be an influencer which… many of them are but I don’t think Olandria would feel like her needs were met with him. I think she liked Taylor on paper (“I love my cowboy”) and let that be enough evidence to hold onto something that wasn’t there at all.
This was the first time I watched Love Island USA!
“You can’t gamify your way into happiness” - I keep seeing this repeated in different lenses. I just read a piece about the “gigification” of relationships reflected in popular media. It feels like a response to curation and keeping up appearances in an increasingly isolating world. Really interesting analysis.
To your point around materialists/past lives: I agree, it feels like Celine Song has been taking a “never meet your heros” approach to romance in both movies. She seems to consistently present that what you always wanted is never as magical as what you discarded along the way.
(can’t say yet whether this is a truth of life or if I’m just particularly susceptible to nostalgia)
Great essay on two of my favorite films of the year. I think the best of art helps us to investigate ourselves, and your essay definitely helped to open up a further internal conversation on these works.
And for the record, I don’t think there is any way to truly be in love without being willing to give up some level of control or “rightness?”
thanks for reading darren. to your second point on relinquishing control, yes, i think this is what they mean when they say you fall in love when you aren’t looking for it :)
I’m not a part of Nicolandria nation, but I do think this argument of being happier if you were stupid could apply hear. Obviously we do not know everything in the villa, but it is obvious that Nic and Olandria have far more chemistry than Olandria and Taylor. But logically, on paper, Taylor is what Olandria wants. Her whole energy in the villa seems to be that she is loving with her head. However, her natural chemistry with Nic is clear, even if it makes no sense, and a perfect one to explore in a temporary environment like the villa. It’s stupid, and the relationship would probably have no longevity out in the real world, but there is something there, a connection, that I wish was explored even if it is nonsensical
Yes yes yes. You’re spot on. I originally had a paragraph about how Olandria thinks with her head while Amaya moves with her heart and is better for it. Amaya is lowkey the most emotional mature person in the house and moves on from men when they don’t give her the respect she needs. Olandria on the other hand overthinks herself into inaction, convincing herself that Taylor likes her when he doesn’t with her “he know where home is” mental gymnastics.
For as much shit as this season got , and it is well deserved because it has been a mess, I think putting this mess out in 4K is good because it has so many examples of what not to do and even caused me to reflect on the way I see myself in these characters and how that may not be the best thing lol
Right? I feel like it’s lowkey giving us powerful lessons lol. Do you think we are getting movie night? Also what do you think they are gonna do about Cierra…
After the stand on business challenge I genuinely worry for the players psyche so I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t do it this season. By now we should have had a meet the family episode but none of the couple are serious enough to warrant that…
Re: Cierra I think it’s too late in the season to pull her out and it doesn’t seem like she’s going to win it, so I think production will keep her for the remaining week left
Yessss! 100% agree. They are both great example of your point and exist on opposite ends of the spectrum. Amayas journey is also just more fun to watch and is more dynamic where as Olandria seems a bit more calculated and guarded. And that’s no shade to Olandria, I’ve been there before. But after being burned so many times, an Amaya like approach in being open hearted but firm on boundaries is the move.
As an avid love island watcher, it seems like the casted a lot of influencers or aspiring influencers this season who were far too aware of their perception. Bella-A, Amaya, and Jalen were the only “normal” ones this season and were rewarded for it when it comes to opportunities outside the villa. The bag that waits for Amaya is going to be crazy which is the ironic twist for those who entered the game trying to obtain the same thing but failed to deliver in authenticity.
I think it's interesting you don't mention Amaya who I think is stupid per this framework personified and obviously America's favorite (she quickly became my favorite). Especially because the cast clearly does a 180 on her when they realize how much the viewers love her and that felt SO calculated.
Also I fully saw Chelley and Ace as trauma bonding and sunk cost fallacy more than a calculated choice. But I also think Ace is a 22 yo idiot (as all 22 yos) who probably had his world shaken more than he'd like to admit when he realized his perception on the show was clearly NOT what he thought. Sorry I am a bit late, I got her through Tell the Bees.
Smart observation! The original Love Island paragraph in this essay was actually contrasting Amaya vs Olandria, how Amaya’s open-ended approach has actually rendered her more emotionally intelligent and open to love than Olandria’s overburden reasoning. But, the show was changing so quickly episode to episode and I didn’t want to “pit two queens against each other,” so I elevated it to a broader theme lol. I think there’s a lot to learn from Amaya. She embraces her inner child and doesn’t spend time convincing someone who doesn’t like her to like her, whereas Olandria was very rational but I think sometimes used that reason to keep herself from being as happy as she could she’s been. Were you happy with the winner?
Oh I love Olandria too but as an emotional girlie who is on the blunter end of the communication spectrum, I am partial to Amaya.
Plus I found Olandria's choices frequently frustrating through no fault of her own and I get where she is coming from. Especially- and I feel really weird for being the one to say this, but she is a darker skinned Black woman so also has more pressures I think around being publicly a raw nerve and chasing what she wants. But like, Taylor didn't like her from the get go. I also didn't like Nic. I think they definitely have a connection and I am team Olandria being happy but his 180 on that supposedly deep connection with Cierra and idk. Everything about him feels fake.
I did feel bad for Clarke but I also saw that more going like Taylor did Olandria dirty- he totally lead her on and like America loves Olandria as they should.
Which is all to say I think this season was super weird for a bunch of reasons but I am overall happy with the ending.
Actually the more I think about it the more my frustration is really the men were SO SO SO SO SO SO SO bad this season so really the fact that any of these women found anything remotely good is a miracle. Like think there were 3 men total I didn't hate at some point, and one of them is Pepe who has a Joker Sleeve.
Hahahaa no because I love Pepe!
He's great! but that tattoo IS SO BAD! In a season of some ROUGH tattoos. Anyway hope you enjoyed it. I really enjoyed your Love Island thoughts so hope you'll keep watching but I am a dyed in the wool reality TV sicko and don't wish that on anyone else.
Yeah, I loved the lore of Nicolandria but Nic is not a viable option for her haha. He’s just trying to be an influencer which… many of them are but I don’t think Olandria would feel like her needs were met with him. I think she liked Taylor on paper (“I love my cowboy”) and let that be enough evidence to hold onto something that wasn’t there at all.
This was the first time I watched Love Island USA!
“You can’t gamify your way into happiness” - I keep seeing this repeated in different lenses. I just read a piece about the “gigification” of relationships reflected in popular media. It feels like a response to curation and keeping up appearances in an increasingly isolating world. Really interesting analysis.
Thanks Michael! Please send the piece, I’d love to read
Sure! It’s https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/unhooking-on-the-gigification-of-intimacy/
thank you!!
Loved this. Locked in to watch Nicolandria be a little stupid.
stupid summer 2025!!!
dumb girl summa
To your point around materialists/past lives: I agree, it feels like Celine Song has been taking a “never meet your heros” approach to romance in both movies. She seems to consistently present that what you always wanted is never as magical as what you discarded along the way.
(can’t say yet whether this is a truth of life or if I’m just particularly susceptible to nostalgia)